Non-Jews are for practice
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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