How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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