i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
