I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
