He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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