found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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