We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
