You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
