Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
