Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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