he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
