Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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