yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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