It's like God shit irony all over that family
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize