You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Randomize
