Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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