Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Ladies don't puke and tell
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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