belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
