I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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