Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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