1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Randomize
