is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?