called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
