So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
