Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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