I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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