He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
