well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
