new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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