margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright