And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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