My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Randomize
