Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
