It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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