I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
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