The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
actually, I'm a sock model
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
