You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
