I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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