girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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