We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
