her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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