I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
