There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
