God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
