You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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