do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
