I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
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Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
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I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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