is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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