Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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