I feel great
I just peed on a car
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
