My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
