Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize